My brain hurts

Oh the days when I sat and typed. Typed until I had half numb crippled fingers. A brain full of ideas. What happened? I never thought writer's block was a real thing, until it struck me. And I am not sure that is what is going on. I have tons of ideas for more books to write. Its just a matter of being interested enough in one of my ideas to dive deep into the world. I have to have a connection to my writing. I have to feel it. Sometimes I feel like I am mourning the loss of something when I think about Wingless. Wingless is my one true love. (in writing). Its that story that I feel so mesmerized, infatuated and a slave to. Who would have thought a book you created could have such sacred ties to your life. Its kind of funny actually. After writing so many stories about Evan and Eve, Kenny, Gray and Ari I really feel like they are hard to let go. But I believe its time to let them go. I have for a while now been playing with ideas in my mind. Could I come up with another story for Wingless? And finally I believe the answer to that is no. My writing has improved and I know I have the capability to give readers what they loved from Wingless in other books I write. So no worries, I am sure there will be other books to come that have the same effect. Just yesterday I got my very first review on Ink. And I was so happy. I have been waiting patiently (not really) to hear someone's thoughts on my newest book. To me its a bit different the my usual writing style. And I really am in love with it. I read it back and was so addicted, and it was me who wrote it. haha. I think it turned out to be a very great story. And the review I got yesterday agreed! It was probably the greatest review ever. It was everything I wanted to hear and that just made my day, week and year. Over the last week or so I have been driving myself mad with coming up with another story. I have ocd with writing. I have to write. I need to write everyday. I stared some stories, but I was bored a few pages in, so then I knew it wasn't the one for me to be writing right now. I also am collaborating with my best friend on a story idea. But, she needs some time before she and I start this project so that is on the back burner. And that was something my brain was ready to conquer. I guess I will try patience but I have no idea how being patient works, so we will see how that goes. Also I was writing a story with my best friend and another friend, I lost interest in the story and school started so it was hard to pull myself back into the saddle, so we decided to make it a short story. Lately I feel like I can't focus on anything in my thoughts for longer then 12.2 seconds. Its maddening. I try to get one task conquered at a time but I am always sidetracked by a kid, phone, cooking, cleaning, Facebook, life, some other task. All three of my kids are in school now. So I have time to write for sure. Now I am scrambling to collect my thoughts and jot them all on paper. So I can start another story, because that would put me back into my happy place. There are a few constants I need in my life to feel like I am aligned with the world. (my world that is lol) and that is writing and music. I am that person that needs a means of expression. I need to let out my thoughts, I need to express my feelings- be it happy, sad, excited, energetic, amused. And listening to music and writing lets those things come out. I have loved writing since I can remember, and now its an addiction. One that I will never go to rehab for. Lastly, I am trying to grow my fan base. Trying to promote and get more readers. What a hard task. I have the vision in my mind. I want to share my writing with the world. Become a known name in many households. Not everyone is going to like my writing or style, but there are those that do. And I want to connect with them. I want people to anticipate my next book. To continue to be moved by my writing. I want to be the change! Well... maybe its not that dramatic of a desire, I don't want to take over the world. But I want to be an author that people say is their favorite. And most importantly I just want to write!! Now that I have let all my crazy thoughts out, I will go tend to other things in life. *runs away*

Triangle

This week I am finishing up volume six in the Wingless series. This song click here The unavoidable thing between us by Evermore has been the theme song for the writing of this book.
When I write I don't have any idea how its going to end, it sort of progresses as I move from one chapter to the next. And this book is really tough, there is so much that Eve is trying to deal with, you would think she would be happy. But can she really be happy without Evan, after all he was the love of her life right?
Evan and Kenny are two kinds of love, and they both have done their share of horrid things to her, she loves them both in different ways. So I'm sure it would make sense how she bounces back and forth bewteen the two of them.
As the writer and reader, I tend to bounce back and forth, Kenny probably will always be a favorite because I love how cocky and sure of himself that he is, but then Evan is upstanding and honorable. And even when he does the wrong thing its for the right reasons. They both have lovely characteristics, they both have reasons for loving Eve.
I can't wait to finish this book and see how it turns out, and I also am wondering if there will be another, I guess once I get to the end I will find out. Any thoughts on the topic?